Fr. Francis King Funeral Homily

Fr. Francis King, 1926-2017

On October 15th, we buried our dear brother, Fr. Francis King, and here is Abbot Peter’s Homily for the occasion.  We deeply appreciate your prayers for our deceased brother.

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Funeral Mass Homily by Abbot Peter McCarthy

Funeral Homily for Fr. Francis King: 10-15-2018

“Abba Anthony said, ‘our own life & our death is with our neighbor. 

If we gain our brother – if we gain our sister – we have gained God.”
( 4th Century Sayings of the Desert Fathers)

My dear brothers & sisters,
On several occasions over the years I have heard communication experts tell us that most human communication is 70% revealing and 30% concealing information about ourselves. I have always felt this made good practical sense & should not be surprising to anyone; what I would call an essentially human tension within us…because most of the time…ALL of the time we don’t really know who we are. My personal experience in community (family) life is that we are mostly a mystery not only to those we live with but to ourselves as well.

I suggest to you that we see this same basically human tension in the human Word of God.

At that time Jesus answered:
I give praise to you Father, Lord of heaven & earth,
For although you have hidden these things
From the wise & learned
You have revealed them to the childlike.

I wonder that it is the child within us that is haunted by this “hiddenness” of God…this concealing God.  This Mystery at the very heart of His Word. We are drawn closer by the concealing – the hiddenness – enchanted – but never as an “expert” only as a “child (like)…”

Honestly, I’ve lived with Fr. Francis for around 45 years & he has always been a haunting mystery for me. He was such a smorgasbord of human gifts & shadows (he could be confident to the point of arrogant; proud of his blue blood heritage; suspicious of human emotions; independent & strong willed; sure of his conservative posturing & (worst of all) a regular weekly reader of the Wanderer newspaper!) & what is more, none of that pile of characteristics added up to the incredibly selfless, tender, & healing presence that Fr. Francis was among us for 66 years!

As his abbot for 25 of those years (& his polar opposite theologically) often accused of being one of those “touchy feely” types; I was often overwhelmed at the unselfconscious, healing, again (tender) presence of this man toward his hurting, wounded , brothers in community whether physically or psychologically…without a Personal Judgement to separate his healing touch from that brother!!!

My brothers & sisters, for over 50 years this beloved mystery monk bandaged our wounds, bathed our weak & aged bodies, clothed our nakedness, prepared us for burial, cleaned up our bodily messes, attended our needy bedsides throughout the hours of night, diagnosed the seriousness (or otherwise) of our ailments, saw to our daily medications, changed our dirty surgery dressings..and soaked our feet & trimmed our toenails…and on & on without self-consciousness…RB’s “caste” love ( a love without personal expectations) Forgive me here Fr. Francis but I want to suggest Caste love is RB’s term for “free love”!! And YOU…of all people…were an evangelist of “free love” among all your brothers in community…you never made an exception…your healing presence would “be there” for anyone who was in need.

It was only this last week (after his death) that I found (what I consider to be) the key to the mystery of Fr. Francis’ healing charism among us. I was looking through his personal file in the abbot’s office and came upon an earlier questionnaire that we were all asked to fill out some years ago. There was this question on the 2nd page: How were you first attracted to the Monastic Life? My eye was drawn to this because it was the only answer on the entire questionnaire that was more than two words! Still, It reminded me of a Haiku – sudden & revelatory – he wrote –“A year before I was baptized (as a young adult) it seemed to make sense…If the Incarnation were True…” Again, notice the very real human tension here…the haunting of the revealing but also concealing – living mystery of God. I am reminded here of an equally brief & equally haunting response from our Kentucky poet, Wendell Berry, who wrote:

The Incarnate Word is with us,
is still speaking, is present
always, yet leaves no sign
but everything that is.

I want to suggest this was the charism – the precious gift- of Fr. Francis’ life among us. He was child-like enough to act “as if” the Incarnation (God becoming human-flesh) was actually true! This would mean (in the English mystic, Caryll Houselander’s words) that:

however difficult or however insignificant our life may seem to be,

it is precious to God as Christ is precious to God. 

On each one in whom Christ lives, the whole of the infinite love of God

is concentrated at every moment.

Fr. Francis lived out this “as if” this childlike trust in the Mystery of the Incarnation with his hands & with his heart & with his life-energy in this community. And so we were actually able to witness, to experience this Good Zeal that the Rule of Benedict identifies as the sign of a mature Monk:

Let them most patiently endure one another’s infirmities, whether of body or of character. 

Let them compete in showing obedience to one another. 

None should follow what he judges useful for himself, but rather what is better for another. 

They should practice fraternal charity with a pure (caste) love….preferring nothing whatever to Christ,

and may he bring us all together to life everlasting. AMEN

+ Abbot Peter McCarthy